Watchdog

Unfortunately, there are times when a peer is a bully, a narcissist, or a manipulator with an overall disregard for others. Here is an example of how to deal with an unprofessional peer.

Frank was the most challenging peer that I ever worked with. Most of my peers have been genuine, supportive, and generous. Many became and still are good friends. I was supportive of their initiatives, and they reciprocated.

Frank, Martha, and I reported to the same supervisor. Frank and Martha had worked for the boss for more than 10 years, and I was the new guy. Frank said that the boss asked him to be a “watchdog.”.

Following the old adage “keep your friends close and your enemies closer,” I met with Frank in his large, honey oak-paneled office every other week. It was odd that there were never any papers on his desk, only an open Bible. Luckily, he had an automatic espresso machine in his office, and we both appreciated the rich smell and taste of the freshly brewed shots.

Frank denigrated people. He spoke ill of Martha, me, and our direct reports. He would pretend to confide in me his negative perceptions of Martha and her team. And you knew he was doing the same with Martha—and the boss—about me and my team. This was a huge distraction from the real, difficult work at hand.

Frank aspired to be a “servant leader” but acknowledged that he had been a bad role model for Doug and Dawn, his direct reports, and that they had earned terrible reputations. Frank was the watchdog, while Doug and Dawn were his pit bulls.

Over the years, other organizations in the enterprise were targeted by the watchdog. Consequently, the open dissension Frank sowed became visible across the enterprise, which reflected badly on both the boss and Frank. After brutal feedback from some peer colleagues, the boss decided Frank needed an intervention. He asked Martha and me to give Frank some feedback and coaching.

I let Frank know that I asked my direct reports from the beginning to always take the high road when dealing with him, Doug, and Dawn. I said that we proactively embraced a nonviolent strategy to deal with them: “You can beat us with batons, send Doug and Dawn—your pit bulls—out to chew on us, and blast us with water cannons, but we will keep marching across the bridge and keep our eyes on the prize.” Thankfully, soon after this intervention, Frank left the enterprise.

You have to wonder how the Franks, Dougs, and Dawns of the world live with themselves. Don’t be like them. Villains always think they are doing the right thing, which justifies them hurting people. The classic book The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene, which I discussed earlier, is an excellent primer for the dirty tricks that are used to disorient and destabilize others while consolidating power. You need to understand these unscrupulous techniques used against you by bad people so you are in a better position to protect yourself.